its hurtsss.....

hye...lme dah xupdate...uisshhh
like usuall...
i will wrote pe yg sayer rase..
hmmmmm.....
knape mesti sayer d pertemukan ngn dy???
yes,last month is his besday...i'm try not to wish..like he did to me..but
lastly i ttp wish even it belated...
yes he got freecall...
one fine day she call me..
n it's miscall sbb i really2 shocked babe!
then i msg him...asking him y..
u noe wat he said???
his friend want to talk wif me......
terase mcm bodoh sgt..not like wat i aspecting lh...
terase frust sgt99x
tp tenang balik...
xpe lah bile ckp ngn kwn dy pown bwat sayer happy...
xpe lah...
tp yg bwat sayer terkilan,...
nape dy xnk call sayer..nape dy xnk ckp ngn sayer....
sedeh wooooo....
tp sayer sedeh bile dy blh call bdk yg suke dy
bdk tue stu sekolaah jer pown ngn dy
tp dyorg tak pernah pown bercakap...
so nape dy blh call bdk tue.....
nape dy xnk ckp ngn sayer????????knape???????
and ape yg bwat sayer lg terkilan..
nape xkp kat sayer yg dy nk smg intra???
nape ngn bdk tue dy blh citer??
knape??ssh ke nk ckp mende btol ngn sayer?????
knape???knape???jgn nk bg harapan kat sayer kalo kamoo suke n]bdk tue....
dan kamoo jgn maen kn bdk tue..kcian dy....
tp.................
nape sayer mesti suke awak????????????
knape sayer knal awak???????????????????
kalo blh undur mase....
sayer harap tok tdk knal pown awak siape......

hmmmmmm.....

xtaw lah ad ke org bace x blog nie..tp blog nie sayer bwat sbgai tempat utk luahan hati ape yg sayer rase....
wow...mende nie dah lame sayer nk citer kn kat blog..tp d sbb kn terlalu bz shingga kn tak sempat nk mengupdate kan nyer..
so..skrg bile dah ad mase sayer update kan lah nyer..wawawawwa
it february dude!!b4 february semesti nyer ad date 31 JANUARY kn..
Yessss!!dat date is my besaday...
i'm really waiting a wishes from u...........
everytimes my phone vibrate..i hope u name appear.....
but dat all just my hope..
don't noe wether u r sengaje or u mmg xingat...
but my ic u did remember it...
just curios..anyway i'm happy with others wishes from others..especially my family nad my bff!!i love u all babe!!...
my day still bright even without ur existent...
i make promise to mmy heart...
promise dat i will never kotakn...wawawwa
"sayer janji nk lupe kn awak...sayer janji xnk msg awk..sayer janji sayer nk delete semua nyer memori sayer tentang awak......."
tp it will never ever happens....
bcos my heart sgt99x syg kn kamooooo!!!!!!!!!!!
bile sayer nk tunai kan janji sayer....ati sayer akn berat sgt...berat seberat2 nyer...3 tahun!!!satu tempoh yg sgt pjg bg sayer...3 tahun mcm kenangan yg jadik...
every single things keep playing in my minds....
sgt99x menyakitkan hati menyayangi mu wahai sahabat......
sayer xbrani nk ckp u r my bffl.....sayer xckup berani mcm yg kwn kamoo bwat..she admit u as her bffl in public..but i'm not dare enought to do it.......

sape kamo?????

sape kamooo??knape mesti muncul dalam hdop sayer????
seblom sayer knal kamoo,hdop sayer xmcm nie....
sayer bahagie jer ngn hdop sayer dulu...
tp skrg...
bile kamoo xd...
sayer kehilangan....
rase kosong.......
dulu sayer mudah suke org....
tp tdk lg bile sayer sudah knal kamooo....
stiap saat sayer hanyer teerpk kn kamoo...

tawar ati sudah...

uishhh..
kental jugak ati neh eak..
sudah 5 ari xcontact..
kuat ckit lg ag okeyh..
tp skung da xd rase lah nk msg ngn dy tue...
slps melihat semua kemesraan dy...
tue la org ckp jgn terlampau sayang,
t jd benci....
tp xtaw la..
skung macam xd rase jer....

my love...

he is my love...
i really2 love him dam much...
he is Tn.Hj JAAFAR bin AWANG...
he is my father...
the man who i'm really2 love in this world..
no 1 can replace him in my heart..
now he not feeling well..
bkn skung..
sjak 10 thn yg lalu..
he got diabetes...
tue yg merisau kn sayer stiap kali nk tinggal umah...
makin hari dy makin kurus..
xsesihat dulu bdn nyer..
tp smlm yg membuat kn sayer sgt2 risau..
he can't walk...
kne pimpin..
sayer sgt2 takot..
sumtimes i think like to xtend my study..
wait until ayah btol2 chat bru nk g blja..
sayer x ley nk citer kat sape2..
kakak t dy risau..da la dy jaoh..
abg yg 1st lg lah mak xbgtaw..
mak xnk dy risau..
he also had problems n family to take care..
n 2nd one..
he also bz..meeting sane sni..
tp i'm feel very glad..
ayah want 2 go 2 the clinic..
it is miracle...
b4 dis he never ever want 2 go....
dr da bsg...
sgt2 lega bile dy da jumpe dr..
so dy da bwat pe dr ckp..
skung dy da pantang ckit..xmcm dulu..
eat everythings..
hopefully you will get well soon...
i love u AYAH!!!!!

really miss u..

i know dis guy seen i at standard 5..
n kami lost contact...
then after spm..
i don't know how..
we suddenly contact each other..
dlu kat sekolah bkn maen musuh..
he is my enemy!
salu gadoh...mende kecik.
gadoh la..bsg2..
mmg pantang lah kalo jumpe..
start contact after reunion sekolah..
time tue xd pown borak2...
tp dlm tepon sgt lah baek..
ok we had being a really good fwends...
nk smbg blajar pown tanyer dy..
ok ke tempat tue...
n finally i plh nk smbg foundation unikl...
semua xsupport..terutame nyer family.xcept my ayah..
he always wif me..
n mamat nie lah jugak salah sorg yg salu support sayer..
bile ad pape jer semua sayer citer kat dy..
dy lah tmpat sayer bercerite...
dy la kwn sayer yg salu bg sayer smgt..
mase berlalu sayer pown hbis da foundation..
then smbg degree..
still cntact ngn dy......
yer dulu dy ad nk sayer crik kn dy makwe..
tp sayer xreti la..
pape jd sayer xnk tggung..
then sayer pown takot..
bile dy da makwe..he will leave me..
smpai la ad ayat nie..
"alah xd org nk pown..ak kn ad.."
dy pown ckp mcm tue kat sayer..
ok kami kwn..tp tok serius bkn skung..
sayer xnk..kecewa lg dan lg..its hurts..
ok fine..sampai la saat tue tibe..
time final exam semester 2...
yes he got problem wif study n fwends n family..
time tue sayer bz nk final
time dy nk..sayer xd tok tlg dy..
i'm really bz wif my study n fwends..
i'm bz wif study group.
then i leave him alone..
to face all the problems..
24/7 i bz..
i'm only reply 1 or 2 msg..
that make him so stress..
then at that time..
there is a girl....
who had replace me....
while i'm not around..
that girl lah yg tlg dy..
yg dgr mslh dy...
patot lah after final sayer cnct asyik bz..
ble tanyer mslh da selesai dy sbok jgn kacow..
ok..fine..sayer yg salah dulu bwat dy mcm tue..
1 day....he told me sumthings.
to b honest wif me..
he admit..
he has another girl..
utk xnk jd lemah..
sayer sagt cool da time jer..
patot la kwn2 dulu xsuke sayer rapat ngn dy..
takot mende nie akan jd..
"man will leave a girl.wen he got another girl...."
sayer xsedeh tue..tp sayer sedeh sbb sayer da hlg tmpat tok bercerite..
sayer hlg tmpat tok mengadu..sayer hlg org yg salu support sayer..
tp tue semua salah sayer gak..
bile dy ad mslh sayer xd...
bile sayer nk citer mslh ad jer alasan dy..
semua nyer b'kaitan ngn gf dy..
gf dy xsuke kami rapat..
tp dy kwn sayer!!! :(
skung sayer rinduu awak.........
i miss my bff....

pulangkan kalo da rse xnk.........................................

arnie ad tgk keadaan sekeliling..
and bwat sayer t'pk...
shoul it b like dat?
sape kamoo nk bwat cam2??mak bapak ktorg pown xmcm tue k..
nape mesti pompuan salu jd mangse???
sape laki nk bwat suke ati dy jer kat pompuan...
even ko suami pown..
ko still xberhak nk bwat camtu kalo isteri tue xbwat slah..
korg engat kami pompuan nie tmpat tok korg lepas kn perasaan??
bile nk marah,korg marah kn kami,semua la..
pe kami bwat xpernah nk btol...
ape korg tue perfect sgt ke???
dulu time ngorat mcm2 kn pijak semut pown xmati..
hmmm..lepas kawen semua terselah...
nape mesti ad lg situation mcm ni??kite semua kn da tepelajar,ad ilmu..
ilmu agame tue tlg la terap kn dlm kehidopan seharian..
pk lah kalo nk bwat something tue..pliss la..
korg kalo da xsyg kami semua nie kn sbg isteri da la..
pulang kn kami kat family kami balik..
da lah jgn nk jd kn kami tpmt tok korg maki,pukul da semua la..
kami pown ad perasaan..ad hati..bkn korg jer taw..
lg2 kalo yg da ad anak tue..xmalu ke??
org luar tgk korg,mengate korg..
da ad anak tue b'tanggungjawb la ckit..kcik yer anak xreti nk b'pk lg..
tp kalo da besar?korg xpk pe yg dy akan bwat??
sayer kcian tgk kalo ad kes mcm nie..
mslh mak bapak anak2 yg rase..
hari2 tgk parents gadoh..korg xpk ke effect pa anak2???
korg xpk pe yg dy rase kalo tgk mak dyorg kne pkul??
dy anak,lg byk kearah ibu taw...
ibu yg lahir kn mereka..
pliisss la wahai "korg2"...
lpas nk kawen pk lah..
korg btol2 rase ad tggungjawab tak..kalo setakat nk kawen ikot nafsu..lupe kn lah...

p/s: luahan ati sayer tgk broken family...sayer blom lg kawen tp bile tgk camnie kn..takot kn..